Category Archives: Gratitude and Kindness

To Opine or Not to Opine

I do a lot of reviews for the places I patronize.  Many of them are with Trip Advisor and some are directly with the businesses.  I remember what Gramma used to tell me, “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”   Well, I’ve always applied this line of thinking to my reviews.  When I am silent, then you know my opinion is not good!

I don’t care what anybody tells me about how bad or distasteful something is.  There has to be a redeeming quality hidden somewhere.  It may be a mystery.  If I was put in a room full of horse poop, rather than complain, I’d be the one needing a shovel.  Because I’d be sure there was a pony in there somewhere.

One key word that comes to mind is Observation.  This includes the entire experience.  Not just what we see, but what we feel, smell, anticipate, or an expectation.  Anything less is just fear of disappointment.

With an expectation of a pleasurable outcome, we observe and anticipate the positive. When I’m disappointed, I allow the folks in charge to do their best to help remedy the situation rather than trying to tell them what to do.

I was writing a review for a hotel in Cardiff, Wales and read a few of the recent reviews before adding mine.  I was surprised that someone had had the exacted same experience as we had, but with a much different attitude and outcome.

We checked in and got into our room to find that we were freezing and could not get the room temp adjusted to a comfortable level.  We realized that was partially due to our slow acclimation to the environment.  Upon calling the desk for help, we were supplied with a solution.  The porter brought us warm blankets (they were actually warm) and then offered to give us a different room.  We were so delighted with the blankets, (they must have heated them in a warmer unit or heated dryer) and having so much fun in the toasty comfort, we didn’t need or want a different room.

So whatever situation you find yourself involved, be the observer and look beyond your focal point.  There is always something good out there, or in there to be found.  It may be a mystery, but worth the effort to solve.

And yes I did share my warm, toasty blanket experience in the review.  May we always joyfully accept the blessings presented to us.child-and-warm-blanket

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Week 23: The Law of Least Effort

I’m out visiting my dad again and he gave me his ticket for the Kristen Chenoweth concert with the OKC Philharmonic.  What a unexpected treat.  She is such a lovely person and quite a dynamic talent.  This was a coming home concert for her and she showed her appreciation and gratitude to her mentors, teachers, students, and the people of Oklahoma.  My favorite song was a tie between Breakfast at Tiffany’s and Little Sparrow.  Please, please look this up and check out her music.  She is a true all round performer.  “Music is my life, and is how I share love.”  I paraphrased this but she uses her music to share happiness and comfort.

I must give a shout out and much thanks to Devon Energy for funding the event and Sonic (her absolute favorite place) for their support.  Without gifts such as theirs concerts like this one would be fewer and father between.

This week I was traveling and couldn’t get on the webinar even by phone!  I eagerly awaited the post of the recording and was surprised again by the content.  Marvelous it was.

My husband frequents our local library so I had to pick up some extra reading.  My pick last week was Deepak Chopra’s The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success.  Well to my surprise I was more than prepare for the webinar.

The chapter that hit closes to home for me was the Law of Least Effort.  Sounds like something everyone would strive to reach doesn’t it.  It’s only three parts; acceptance, responsibility, and defenselessness (detachment).

  1. Accept this moment as it is, committing to it because it is as it should be.  “You accept things as they are, not as you wish they were in this moment”  D. Chopra
  2.  “Responsibility means not blaming anyone or anything for your situation, including yourself.”  D. Chopra
  3.  Once you practice defenselessness (detachment) you no longer need to defend your point of view.  If this is practiced, there can be no argument.  And you gain enormous amounts of energy that otherwise would have been wasted.

What if we could all do this consistently?

One quote from D Chopra’s friend that I really liked follows.

“The past is history, the future is a mystery, and this moment is a gift.  That is why this moment is called ‘the present’.”

Please relax and take the 9:39 to watch this Hero’s Journey.  You’ll hear his lovely song, FIREFLIES.  It’s special to me because my Precious Caleigh gave me the CD and said, “You’ll like this.”  And I did.

 

Week 21: Finding and Being Happy

When you are a young, before influences invade the psyche, you know exactly what you want to do and be.

Now of course we all know that this changes, might I say, often enthusiastically, as we see, learn, and experience new things.

But why do so many folks just let go of their dreams, placing them on the shelf?   Often forgetting where they are and what they were.

New opportunities come along luring us in different directions.  Sometimes good and sometimes not so good.

Having done many things and having had three totally, different professions,  I still am looking for “me”.

Where is that carefree, fun loving, mischievous person I once was?  Bowing to job expectations and others opinions, sometimes I don’t know who I have become.

Don’t get me wrong–I’m still me and I like myself.  My mom would say I just grew up.  But like Peter Pan,  I wish in some ways I didn’t have to do so.

I’ve learned over the years that if I keep “banging my head against the wall” in an attempt to accomplish something, perhaps I need to change directions.  Duh?!

Not every thought or idea is what we need to attempt.  We should dream big, but realize that the dream may need adjusting and refining from time to time.  And that’s OK.

By releasing our pride and letting go of preconceived notions, things will miraculously fall into place.  Patience is a big part of it too.  I have to remind myself that the journey is “by” the compass, not “on” the clock.

The Master Key Master Mind Alliance has brought about an awareness within me.  I am so grateful for the big,    no,    massive   push I have been given.  I feel as if my true self has been a mere painting in progress all these years.  Definitely an oil painting.  Slow to dry, easily smudged, and so graciously painted over and repaired as needed.

My daughter made an observation  about me that I never realized.  The evidence goes back for years.  It caught me totally off guard.  I never would have recognized this in me and I surely wouldn’t have chosen England as a trip destination if my son wasn’t living there.

Yes, she called me an Anglophile.  Then she so politely informed me, “Mom you are,  you love all things English!”

My time in England was exhilarating.  Still the memories are tender and fresh.

Finding comes from within.  Permit yourself to Be what you find.  Then your journey to find your true self will lead you to your successful destination.

Happiness is all along the way.  As Gramma used to say, “Keep your eyes peeled.   Or you might miss something!”

You can be what you will to be, and that includes HAPPY.

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FIND IT

BE IT

SHARE IT

THEN GIVE IT AWAY.

Week 20: The Happy Tool Box

With snow on the ground outside, I settled in for the weekly webinar next to a warm fire in the fireplace.  I was very comfortable enjoying not only the created environment, but especially the thoughts and guidance that the MKMMA team dished out.

I did feel a little guilty enjoying that time.  But I ask myself, WHY?

Comfort is an interesting concept.  We don’t have to experience things ourselves to be able to feel comfortable or for that fact, uncomfortable.

I learned about Mirror Neurons this week.  These neurons fire whether we see “it” or actually “do it”.  And they can tie us to other’s feelings.

Now I understood why I couldn’t watch a boxing match comfortably.  Even though I understand the sport and scoring, I always had a strong emotional response to the punches.  My son tried wrestling at a young age–we have a great program here for the youth–I could barely watch.  I felt, what I was seeing.

I’ve learned to be grateful for more than just the obvious, by changing my perspective.  If something negative occurs, I can be grateful (as Mark J suggested) for the seed of greater opportunity that manifests.

But what about:  Anger, Fear, Guilt, Hurt Feelings, Unworthiness

Can we turn these uncomfortable emotions into tools?  This is what I came up with during a sit.  I have already had to apply a few, and it’s always preceded with a deep cleansing breath.

Here’s a matching game.  Take the Uncomfortable emotion and Match to the new Comfort Tool

A.  Fear         B.  Anger      C.   Guilt      D.  Hurt Feelings     E.  Unworthiness

______  self admiration, acceptance,love, and encouragement

______  humble wisdom, graciousness, and kindness

______  tenacious determination

______  compassionate understanding

______  loving unconditional forgiveness

 

What you come up with may be different, and that’s OK.  And for goodness sakes DO NOT get out a red pencil and score yourself!!!    E,C,A,B,D

It’s our choice to decide what tools we use in life.  I choose the one’s in the Happy Tool Box.

Week 19: Getting It Down

I shopped the bargain table and picked up a small notebook this week.  The Paris motif is nice-I would have preferred something a little more English, but it holds my notes.  I found a good buy on a fountain pen, pencil set and decided to write out my readings, affirmations, and ideas in it.  It fits in my pocket book easily.  I enjoyed penning all the sayings and plan on adding lists from my index cards.  There is a purpose for this.note book

My Dad’s memoirs are a priority to me as he’s entered his 10th decade of life.  This along with Scroll V has really made an impact on me.  I want my little book entitled, “Live Your Life” (it came that way) to be found, discovered, snooped in and just basically read by those close to me.  I want them to see the words written (we know if it’s written it’s true) about how I feel about them, life, existence, gratitudes, loves, dreams, hopes and joys.  You get the idea.  If this is my last day,  I will have left some of my self-directed thoughts.

On that note,  I bumped my tablet off a lower shelf, it hits the heat register making a loud thump.  As I’m on the floor trying to retrieve it, my daughter rushes into the room in a slight panic.  She’s startled to find me on the floor (at first she couldn’t see me at all).  “Are you alright”? she inquires alarmingly.  “Yea, Yea, I’m not dead yet and it may be a while”   I replied.  You see, I had decided to pick up everything else that I’d dropped in the last few days while I was down there.  Doesn’t everyone do that?  “Use your head, save your Knees!!”  We had a good laugh.

Cudos to the Crew, Divas, Dudes, and Dudettes (hope I didn’t leave anyone out) running the show there in Kauai and around the world.  I have studied some of this material here, there and yonder, but the way this material is compiled is a fuse.  A fuse that has more and more powder added each week until….

KABAM.

You’re hit all at once with the realization of what you’ve known all along.

I wake up grateful for the new day and another opportunity to use my uniqueness, sharing kindness and love with other people.  Knowing I am intuitively and harmoniously one with the universe.

 

Week 18: Honoring the Miracle

I’m off to visit my dad for a few days.  Thanks to a certain airline that knows how to “shake it’s tail” for me, I scored tickets at one third the usual fare.  It’s a 9 hour drive or 2.5 hour flight each way.  And is always an enjoyable journey.

I’ve become possessed with the notion of putting my dad’s memoirs in written form, maybe even having them published.  My main focus is to have a record of his experiences to share with my children and grandchildren.  (yes this is part of my DMP).

Several years ago I gave my parents and Grandmother books in which to record their memories.  There are quite a few blank pages in the books so I decided to interview them.  Got a little more information, but not enough.  My grown children love hearing stories about themselves as children, and are just now finding interest in my memories.  So this is important.

We all have different life experiences, but some of his blew me away.  I found an old photo of a little boy with two huge mules.  Casually Dad commented that when he was around 6 years old, he and his older brother had their own team of mules for working the farm.   He barely stood as tall as the mule’s chest.  Here he is on his plow with the team of mules.

photo photo 1 (1)

 

Those were definitely different times.

One of the questions in the memory book that I put to Dad was, “what did you love most about your mother?”  His answer struck me as curious.  He pondered for a long time as if he didn’t understand the question.  His answer:  “Because she was my mother.”

“No, no Dad.  What special thing did she do, or something special that you liked about her?”   He again replied,  “Because she was my mother.”

To photo (2)this day that’s all he’d say.  I’ve thought about it a lot and his reply was totally accurate.  Her specialty in life was being a mother and wife, caring for her family and making sure they became independent productive people.  And that they did.

My grandmother was natures greatest miracle!

I was moved by Marks closing remarks in our Week 18 video.

WE ARE nature’s greatest miracle.  To honor our creator, we extent the miracle of our birth everyday by being a channel of gratitude and kindness, and being in 1st class service to other people.   Be the miracle, inspire miracles.